The most horrible of nights *UPDATE

If you are a believer in prayer, or angels, or any higher power making decisions, tonight, please give a thought to one of S3's teammates.

This afternoon, a boy (I will call him Eddie....because he reminds me of Eddie Munst3r) got in trouble for shooting off M-80's in the woods by his house...(those are big firecrackers for those of you not in the know) and the police were called. He and his friend were taken to their homes for their parents to take care of the discipline.

Eddies father, is a drunk. He is loaded at every game he comes to. He reeks of booze, and yells at his son from the sidelines.

If Eddie misses a pass (he and S3 play lacrosse and football together), his father yells at him --and everyone within shouting distance--that he is pissed. His son has to be the star.

The ironic part is that Eddie IS a good athlete. Amazingly he BEAT brain c@ncer when he was just 10 years old. It was a very rough road but the kid is tenacious and he rallied back.

Consequently, he is a couple of years older than his classmates, but on par emotionally. He has had some issues with temper, and sadly, doesn't have a lot of friends, as he is somewhat unpredictable and difficult to be around.

S3 only has two "friends" out of dozens that I have told him are not welcome in our home....Eddie is one of them.

He was here once for a little gathering S3 had, and when all the other kids were outside shooting hoops, eating hot dogs and having fun, Eddie was wandering around inside. I was keeping an eye on him and at one point, picked up our cat, held him like a football and drew back to make the pass. Yes. He was going to throw the cat across the room.

I came in just in time, yelled his name and asked him what he was doing. He looked at me, as though nothing was wrong, set the cat down and walked outside. ....no hint of remorse or acknowledgment that anything was amiss.

This afternoon, after the M-80 incident, he went to his room and tried to commit suicide.

My heart is devastated for his mother. His father, will drink himself into oblivion and I can't help but wonder if whatever he said to Eddie when the police brought him home, is what sent Eddie to that dark place.

We have known this family for years through sports. At one tournament, the mother and I were the solo mom's...our husbands couldn't make the trip so she clung to me, and I could tell she was breathing life without her oppressive husband with her. She talked, she laughed, she smiled....all things that were never present when Eddies dad was around. I saw a very different woman that weekend.

By the time the rescue squad got to their house today, Eddie was barely clinging to life. He was unresponsive, unconscious but he was breathing shallow breaths. On the way to the hospital, he was posturing. (this is a body's reaction to significant brain injury).

Our hospital is a small town hospital, but we are very close to several trauma centers and they flew him there.

As of the time I write this, we don't know if Eddie is going to make it or not.

I feel as though someone kicked me in the gut. Now, I feel terrible for not welcoming him into my home (though, truth be told, very few parents welcomed him, so I am sure I am not alone in my guilt).

I wonder if he needed someone, and that breaks my heart. His mom has been through so much, I cannot even imagine where her head is tonight.

**UPDATE**

The last word we got last night, was that Eddie is on a ventilator in ICU. Later today, they will do a more in depth assessment, but as of last night, he had a 50/50 chance of survival, depending on what the amount and duration of his lack of oxygen did to his brain. If he survives, he has a very great chance of significant brain damage.

I am still stunned that his boy really believed this was his only option.

His mother warned me

BigD's mother warned me before we were married that BigD has never taken criticism well.

As a child, teen, and even adult, he would have an internal meltdown when he was called out for a mistake....either big or small.

You see, he doesn't think he is ever wrong. E.V.E.R.

It is the one thing about him that drives me batty. When I make a mistake, I own it, and try not to do it again.

Two days ago he got a letter from the bank notifying him of an overdraft in his account. He shook his head and said they must be wrong and I foolishly thought he would promptly call them and correct the "error" (which I knew was his, not the banks, but I kept my mouth shut).

Fast forward to today. ANOTHER letter. He never even picked up the phone. Did he think that it would just solve itself?????

Now he is seven days over-drafted at 8 bucks a day, plus the initial overdraft fee, and the actual FOUR HUNDRED dollars he spent, when it wasn't there to spend.

He has no idea how he did that....but I know. He was away with 3 other guys at a training seminar and I know that he was using his debit card, without even giving it a thought.

We have several checking accounts and this one is the one he uses for his stuff. About 10 days ago, I deposited $1500 into that account and he was like a kid in a candy store.

New boots, a fancy new power washer, etc etc.

He debited and debited until he was happy with the amount of toys he had, subtracting incorrectly in his head, not bothering to write any of the debits down.

This would be a good point to tell you that I take care of all the bill paying......because of the fact that when he did it earlier in our marriage this sloppy math happened on a regular basis.

So, today, he asked if I could transfer money to cover the damage.

He could tell I was pissed. I honestly don't care what he buys or what it costs, I just want him to freaking pay attention!

So, being the horrid woman that I am, I asked him "how on earth do you spend $400 and not know that there isn't enough to cover it". It wasn't said in anger, just disgust.

He told me not to give him "attitude". I dropped it there and walked out of the room. Had I stayed, it would have gotten ugly. Really ugly.

I am so pissed right now I can't see straight.

He has issues with appearances. He always has. If we are out with another couple, he always insists on picking up the tab, because he doesn't want them to think that we can't.

He has to have things for show. He wants people to think that we don't struggle to live where we do, to drive the nice cars we have etc etc.

Both of his brothers are very very well off. Lots of bucks, and no worries. BigD has always felt lesser because of his 'average' financial status in the family. This is so stupid I can't stand it. Neither one of his brothers has ever looked down on him in the least.

We don't have tons of debt, (thanks to me paying things off whenever I can--not to brag, it is just important to me, and much less stressful for me, if I don't have to worry daily about who we owe--so call it self preservation).

He does know that me handling the money is for the best....but he wouldn't say it out loud to save his life.

So...he is now pissed at ME, because I had the nerve to point out to HIM that this is something that he caused by his carelessness. (though I never used those words). He left here with S3 for a Friday night football game with a huge chip on his shoulder. How in the hell is this MY fault?

It is times like this, that make me even more sure, that I would never ever get married again.

Yes, I know, never say never.....but honestly, sometimes the bad outweighs the good.

Marriage is even harder than parenting. At least the kids learn from their mistakes.

What makes a person unable to accept their flaws??? None of us are perfect.

S1, S2 and S3, all know that their dad cannot admit failure at anything. Thankfully, they have been able to use it as a lesson, and all of them are able to say, "I screwed up" and move on.

I know this is rambling, but I had to get it out. I am sure I will toss and turn tonight and have to resist the urge to smother someone that is in bed with me.

And I don't mean the dogs.

High school--friends or foes

Did all of you love your high school years? Most of my adult friends go on and on about all the fun they had in high school...best years ever....would love to go back....

I must be very very odd. I really don't remember much about high school, and the parts I do remember, do not include a significant amount of great times.

I was always hovering between mortified, terrified, and humiliated.

I have recently been contacted by a couple of girls from my Alma Mater about a possible reunion. They actually seem very nice. I do remember them, and remember that they were the "smart ones" in the class.

We have reconnected via f@cebook and to be honest, when I got the first note from one of them, I IMMEDIATELY felt 15 again. Nervous, envious, uncomfortable, wondering why they friend requested me, was there an ulterior motive, did they just want to see if I had gotten fat...did I say insecure?

Today, after I sent a catch up letter to one, she sent one back. She said (and these are her words) I must admit I was quite surprised to read that you considered yourself, shy and insecure in high school, I remember you as a friendly girl who was nice to everyone.

I had to read that twice. Certainly she couldn't be remembering ME. It is so strange to hear how other another person observed me to be.

If I was nice to everyone, it had to have been because I was terrified of being made fun of for not being rich (it was a private girls school), for not smoking pot (though there was that one time in a cornfield...never mind), for not drinking (I drank B@@nes Farm Strawberry Hill with my friends from the wild public school) and I was dating a senior from the wild public school when I was a sophomore (and he was reaaallly hot), and I never went to any of the parties that the cool girls had (though, since I was never actually invited, that wasn't a stretch).

It was a long 4 years of my life that weren't exactly fun. My home life was a little hard (bizarre step-father) and I felt very disconnected from people--I thought. I didn't find out till years later that I most likely was suffering from a combination of anxiety and depression. If I had only known then.....I wonder how my life would have been different.

So~~what were your high school years like?

A story and a two question quiz

Sadly, this week in our small city, a 7 year old boy lost his life in a house fire.

It was not long after midnight when a passerby noticed the fire and called 9-1-1.

An officer was very close by, and was at the scene in less than 90 seconds.

By the time he arrived, the 31 year old mother and her 4 other children were outside. She told the officer that her 7 year old was upstairs.

The officer tried to go up the stairs, but was pushed back by flames.

The fire department was on the way, but a neighbor brought over a ladder and the officer climbed to the second story bedroom, broke the window, climbed in and grabbed the boy from his bed.

He handed the boy out the window to the firefighters/ paramedics that were on the scene by this point, and the squad took the boy, and the cut, and burned officer to the hospital.

It was determined that the boys 4 year old brother had accidentally started the fire, lighting a cigarette, from a lit candle. He was afraid he would get caught, so he tossed the cigarette into the closet to hide it.

These are the facts. No embellishment, no exaggeration.

Last night, the police department got word that the family is blaming THEM because they didn't save the boy.

The word lawsuit is being tossed around.

Am I crazy to think that the fact that a 4 year old was up at midnight, playing with fire, no parent was supervising, that maybe the fault has nothing to do with the officer that is burned and sporting stitches all over his arms from trying to rescue the boy?

Call me crazy then, because I am disgusted that blame for this tragedy is being shifted to the person that had nothing to do with this child's primary care.

I know this officer. He is a wonderful human being. He is married with young children of his own, and this tragedy has torn him up, not only with his numerous physical cuts, but his heart is broken that he couldn't save the little boy.

Here is the quiz. Am I missing something? Is it somehow not a parents job to know what their 4 year old is doing at midnight?

Fall photos

The last roses of the season.

Our trees are in full color right now, and the leaves will probably be gone within the week.

This means that soon, we will be in for 7 months of cold, and crazy heat bills, before things come back to life again.

I need to move. This is what I see every time I have to leave the house. They know when I put on my "good" clothes, fix my hair, and I smell good, that means I am leaving...and boy, do they get pissed.

criminal painters

It is done....and I love it. Because of my cheapass camera, the color isn't represented exactly, but this gives you an idea.

As you can see, the room is very tall, and since I don't do ladders, I had the criminal painter do this room for me.

I love to paint, but I know my limits.

(The white spot you see in the center, isn't a ghostly orb, it is just another flaw in the cheapass camera).

I also had him paint the ceiling in the kitchen. I was STUNNED to see the difference. I thought the ceiling was white already. Wow. I guess all of my years of fabulous cooking took its toll on my ceiling.

BigD is usually annoyed when I forge ahead and have projects, that I have asked him to do for years, completed when he is away. But, this time...he was very happy to have this task completed. He is not a patient man, and when you have to gut a room of years worth of belongings, well, they have to go somewhere, so the rest of the place looks like a temporary junk yard. Believe me, it is much less stressful to do these things when he isn't around for a couple days. Call it self preservation on my part.

So, one room down, too many more to go.

18 years of boys in a house, well, lets just say, criminal painter needs to stay out of jail and on my speed dial.

15. YEARS??!!

15 years ago this morning, I was sliced and diced and became a mother for the third and final time.

My baby turns 15 today.

He woke up and announced: "ONLY SIX MONTHS TILL I GET MY TEMPS! YES!"

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Criminals and remodeling

Ok. So here is the story. This kind of shit can only happen here in the nutty household.

A couple of years ago S2 worked one summer for a local painter/remodel guy in town, who is the father of one of S2's friends.

If you have been reading here for awhile, you may recall that this painter, though a really nice person, took 3 months to pay son the last $90 he owed him. This really ticked me off and I swore I would never hire this guy again for any jobs.

Fast forward to now. I am a couple years older, the bedroom that needs to be painted is two stories high, and I hate being on ladders.

BigD is out of town at a school till Friday, so I get the big idea to have the room painted as a surprise for him (also I want it done in this century, which meant hiring someone outside of this house to do it). I thought of this 3 days ago. So, since I don't do heights, I went on the prowl for a painter to do it for me.

When you only have a 2 day window, you sort of have to take what you can get. Yeah, you know where this is going.

Yep, friends dad was available this week. Now, in his defense, he is good at what he does. But, in the past he has had some significant legal charges leveled at him for his lack of paying bills. Well, I guess to be truthful, he DOES pay but with check paper that is only worth whatever the paper is worth.

Yep..he is a check kiter.

I really don't care, as long as he does my painting for a fair price and does a good job.

Here's the kicker though. Back when S2 was working for him, we found out that this guy had some warrants out for his arrest. Not cool. If you recall, BigD is a whoopdeedoo in law enforcement guy, so our son working for a criminal wasn't a good idea...hence the quitting and waiting for his last check part.

Ok, fast forward to today again. As I sit in my office, painter man is in the room right above me spackling, cutting in edges, and cleaning up woodwork, and basically doing what I can't/won't do.

On a whim, I decided to go to our city/county courts website to see how his old cases turned out. THERE WERE 26 CASES DATING BACK TO 1996. Shit.

The ones at the top had case numbers that were much higher than the ones at the bottom of the list, thinking they were probably newer, I clicked on them.

They are current and active. Right now he is being sued for over $8000.

The kicker.....the dude is supposed to be in court TODAY!!!

I almost shit. So...here is a wanted man, in the house of a law enforcement professional, painting, while the law enforcement professional is in another state.

I am hoping that the swat team doesn't come to the door. It would be a little hard to explain to BigD.

I called S2, because I knew he would get a reeealllly good laugh and his advice~~~

"Wait till the turd is done, then turn him in for the bounty".

Yep, that's my boy.

So, if I don't post for, oh say, about a week......send help.

Take the stairs

This is one way to get us up off our butts! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2lXh2n0aPyw

SUCKY CUSTOMER SERVICE

Is one of my biggest pet peeves!! I am really beginning to think that people really don't give a shit about their quality of work.

I have been having an issue with my bank for about the last 6 months. All of my "regular" tellers have been moved "UP" the chain to other branches and I am convinced they have trolled the rosters of idiots to fill their positions.

We have 5 accounts with this bank. Yes, 5. I am there frequently and am very familiar with the way things are done there. There are times when I need to transfer money from one account to another...the ones that are linked online are no problem...type a few numbers and boom, money from one to the other.

Twice in the last week, I have had to transfer to my business account that isn't linked to my other accounts, which necessitated a simple phone call and request. I AM LISTED ON ALL ACCOUNTS since I am the bill-taker-carer of the family.

Twice in the last week, I have had to actually argue with the dingbat that tells me I am not allowed to transfer. Twice I have had to talk to the manager to get this taken care of. People, this is a simple thing. She just has to click a few keys on her keyboard. This last time, she told me it would take 48 hours to process....WHAT???? This is money that is already there....we are not waiting for checks to clear etc. This money is sitting in one account being shifted to another account, owned BY THE SAME PERSON.

The last straw was three days ago when she transferred it without an argument. I should have known it was too easy. She transferred it to the wrong damn account.

Is it so hard to do your freaking job? It is all there in front of you. I asked the manager if this was her first week on the job and he told me that she has been with the bank for several years, just not at my branch. I think I know why they shuttle her around.

So, this morning, S1 asks if I can check where his online contact lens order is, as he is over two weeks on his current pair of lenses.

I call the nice people at Len$.com and they tell me the hold up is with my bank. They are denying the charge. It is on my debit card for cripes sake and there is three times the amount needed, already in the account.

Please say a prayer for the person that picks up the phone at the bank in ten minutes when I call. They will really need it.

(For those of you that suggest that I change banks, please realize what a complete pain in the ass that would be. We have had these accounts for over 15 years..my check numbers are in the 3000's, all of my online bills, household etc are all linked with these accounts and it would literally take me days to change everything to new accounts...and honestly....would any other bank be any better??? Customer service sucks. Nobody really cares any more.)

Mama Kat's at it again

http://www.mamakatslosinit.com

She left her prompts, for elaboration, on this gloomy Thursday.

The Prompts:

1.) Interview your mom...questions might include, How has motherhood changed you? What ages were your favorites? Do you miss having having kids in the house? What was the most difficult part of being a mom for you? What was the most rewarding part? etc... I think I'll ask my Mom if I'm her favorite child and when she dodges the question (again) I'll scream, "DAMMIT WOMAN! Answer the QUESTION!!" Feel free to steal my idea.

2.) Tell us the story of your birth.

3.) How did you parents choose your name? What does it mean? What would you change your name to if you could?

4.) Describe a moment when you realized your mom was more than just a mom.

5.) Write a poem for your Mama.

I chose #4.

I remember that day VIVIDLY even though it was about 4000 years ago.

She and my father had FINALLY divorced and I had already noticed a calmer, less distracted woman taking the place of where my worried mom was. We lived in a nice little ranch style house (the one with the creepy wooden doors that I mentioned previously) and the two of us has settled into a nice routine of me being a kid and her finally being a woman that didn't have to worry about being beaten to death.

One day when I was about 8 the doorbell rang.

Like most kids, I ran to the door, like it was my job, but on the other side, was a man. A man that looked like he was my mom's age. I had no idea who this was, but he asked for my mom, so I yelled to her that there was a strange man at the door for her. I remember him laughing at me because I called him strange.

I remember he was wearing a suit and tie and he smelled good. The kind of good smell that meant you were going somewhere special.

When my mom came to the door, after I had not bothered to let the stranger in the house, my mom let out an "OH MY GOD" and invited this man in. It turns out, they had been friends in high-school and he was back in town visiting family and stopped by to say hi. (I found out much later that he was also divorced and was snooping around to see if my mom was available--yuk, yeah, even all these years later, yuk).

Anyway, this man took up residence in our living room for what felt like an eternity. Laughing, recalling "old times" and talking to my mom about dancing.

DANCING?

I hadn't known till then that my mom was an incredible dancer, and after high school, went to the big city to teach dance. Apparently, she was very well known and well regarded and when she was building this life, she met and married my father and her life went to hell.

But that is only part of when I realized she was more than a mom.

When the good smelling man in the suit got up to leave...mom walked him to the door (I was in and out of the room the whole visit, because I didn't really like the way this man was looking at my mom, and she was giggling...LIKE A KID...and it was weird.

They get to the front door, promise to keep in touch, then it happened. He kissed her. ON. THE. MOUTH. I was completely repulsed. Nobody had ever done that to MY mother. The kicker...when he left, she was SMILING. She had actually LIKED it.

At that moment, I knew she was not just a mom. She was a mom that liked being kissed my men in suits that smelled like dressed up men smell.

As far as I know, he never came back. She explained to me that he was just an old friend, but I think with the horrified, traumatized look on my face, she couldn't have told me anything else!

Do deer eat marshmallows?

We have a huge deer population in our area. Most of them live in MY BACK YARD. At any time of the day, there will be several wandering around. We have identified the same 9 over and over again. There are two momma's with their babies, that we have watched since they were very very small...smaller than a big dog...and now they romp and play like it is their job.

Yesterday there were 3 bucks, antlers and all, parading back and forth. They were huge. We are not a hunting family, but have friends that spend DAYS in tree stands waiting for deer to "thin the herd", never seeing any. I think it is because they are all roaming around our fire-pit snacking on leftover hot dogs and marshmallows.

Needless to say our herding dog, Harley (part sheltie, part mommawasawhore), loses his little mind. He can either smell them, or hear them, but somehow he knows when they are there. On occasion he misses the fact that they are there, until he jaunts to the yard. Then all hell breaks loose. He barks and barks and barks, running back and forth trying to get them all in order, and they just look at him and laugh. Yes, the deer laugh. Harley is not a very effective herder.

Please excuse the fact that I took the picture through a very dirty kitchen window (where the hell IS that maid anyway??) and enjoy my daily diversion from the real world.

I swear

I had the craziest conversation today with an office manager of a former client. This client switched to an in-house electronic records system so they didn't need my services any longer (if you have been reading for awhile, this is the client that had no intention of telling me they were switching over......one of their staff was concerned about me not knowing, and being cut off financially without any warning and she told me....yes, it is that office, and that manager that knew for 4 months about the change before I ASKED HER about the "rumor" going around that they were changing.

Last April, I had written her an email asking if they were planning on returning my digital equipment to me. They had a total of 5 units that retailed at close to $300 each. I had let the client use them, at no charge, since I was providing their tr@nascription. Once they converted and wanted to keep the units "just in case", I told them I would need to charge her a nominal fee each month ($10 per recorder) so they could continue to leave them in a drawer gathering dust, rather than me using them for another client.

During our email exchange in April, the manager informed me that they would like to return 2 and keep 3 for incidental use, so the $30 a month (I used to bill out about $1000 a month to them) was a courtesy to them. Two weeks ago, I emailed her again, telling her that since I had not had any work from them in close to a year, I would either like to have my equipment returned, or if they desired, they could re-think the purchase of the remaining 3 units. I told her new they retailed for $300 per unit, but that because of the fact that they were now "used" (though in perfect condition) I would only be asking $150 each. (This is what these units are going for on Ebayy and Am@zon).

I never got a response.

So I sent another email.

No response.

One day I had the need to speak with one of their staff regarding a personal matter and asked her if the nasty manager had quit---nope, she was still there making everyone crazy.

So, today, S3 needed to see a doctor and his doctor happens to be one in that practice.

When I called for an appointment, I told the girl to tell manager that I would be in and wanted to see here either before or after S3's appointment. When we got there, she summoned me into an exam room, glared at me and very defensively stated " I sent you an email twice"...this is before I even had a chance to say--hey, how ya' doin? So right off the bat she was defensive.

So, I very politely repeated the information that was in my very polite email, requesting the return of my equipment or payment for purchase.

She scrunched up her nasty little face and said with great attitude "how much are they??" (seeing it in writing does not convey, in the least, the snottiness of the tone). When I told her they were the same as I had stated in the email, $150 per unit, she harrumphed and said "THAT'S $300 DOLLARS".

I then corrected her, telling her that in fact they had 3 machines, not 2, and she gritted her teeth...honest to god, and started to argue with me. I wonder why for the last year she has been paying me $30 a month for 3 units if she only had 2...hmmmmmm.

She said "but we still use those"...um ok, but they are MINE and I either want them back or you can buy them from me--flake. She had the audacity to tell me they are using my equipment and don't want to have to install another (extremely-brainlessly-simple) program with new units, into their computer, and expected me to say,,,,,oh, that's fine, keep using them.

I told her that I have another client that needs units from me, and I either needed those back (since I no longer receive any work from them, I think I have been rather generous in not getting them back before now!) or bought out, so I could in turn, supply the other client.

So after listening to her argue, watching her face turn red, and seeing her head, damn near explode, I told her I would check my records (knowing that, I am not only a hoarder of useless crap in my house, I also hoard emails ;)

I had put all of our earlier communication from April in a mail folder, so when I got back to my office, I opened the mail and forwarded it right back to her....you know, the one where she told me they were returning 2 of the 5 units. Now, I am not a genius, but I am pretty certain that leaves 3. All the details were laid out in that April email...cost, alternatives etc etc.

Later this afternoon, I got another email from her. She wanted me to ONCE AGAIN, tell her the cost "as you said to me today" (even though she had hit reply to me, from the email that already had the info--duh) so she could present it to the docs.

Being a complete sarcastic bitch that I am, I simply copy/pasted the old email, on top of the chain of emails, only adding the line "as I told you earlier today, and also stated in my previous email of April 6th".......

Let her try to tell the docs that this came "out of the blue". No way sistah. I have a paper trail of your lower case, non-punctuated, no greeting emails.

Trust me, the next time I have to take S3 to see the doc, he will get the truth from me. I am a bitch like that.

To be continued...........

When I look in the mirror

This is for mamakat http://www.mamakatslosinit.com. Every Wednesday she gives out assignments that need to be posted on Thursday.

This week, I decided to participate, using the prompt : When I look in the mirror.....

I see a women that is much older than the person making the reflection. In my mind that lady in the mirror still thinks she is in her 20's, yet she is more that twice that, but thankfully, has twice the experience than that 20 year old had.

I see tired eyes, where there used to be bright blue, innocent eyes.

I see wrinkles, and creases, where there used to be pale white, smooth skin, covered in freckles.

I see someone that is worried about growing old and losing her ability to take care of herself. Independence should be cherished.

I see a woman that has always worked, but has been blessed to have work that enabled her to be home when her children hopped off the school bus, and sat at the kitchen table telling her about their days at school. This is a very very grateful woman.

I see a woman that could write at least 2 books about her life. The life that has caused those wrinkles and creases.

I see a woman who has had most of her life dreams fulfilled. Only needing to see her children happily married, and with their own children, to make her life complete.

I see my mother.

There is a wonderfully creative, incredibly sweet and very generous artist/blogger that you should be following if you aren't already. Her name is Lorrie Veasey...she lives in my favorite city in the world and she has put her creative juices to work in so many areas, and her contributions to her community are many(Yes Lorrie....I read newspapers from your city;)

A couple of weeks ago, I had the amazing luck to win one of her contests and she told me I could give her a few ideas for a custom piece that she would create for me. To say I was excited would be an understatement.

I shot off a couple of ideas to her and she actually blended both ideas into one very creative piece. This travel mug will see so many commuter miles--to S3's sporting events, work, etc. I did have to cover the boys names (to maintain some anonymity here;) but if you ignore the sticky note, you can see the creation she made JUST FOR ME!!!!!

http://ournameisblog.blogspot.com --- check her out :)

THANKS AGAIN LORRIE!!!!

Uh-oh...

These pups were born this morning. Momma is all of 11 pounds and the pups are the smallest pups I have ever seen. The one that I am holding........I may have to keep her. BigD doesn't know what is twirling in this devious little mind of mine. Bwahahahahah. If you look closely enough at the top photo, you will see that the pup on the end has a little thread stuck to her belly......at least I thought it was a thread, it is her umbilical cord! How this little dog delivered 8 babies (sadly one was stillborn) I will never understand. Bodies, even animal bodies are amazing!! When we walked in momma dog got right up, and came over to us wagging her tail and I swear was leading us back to her babies to show them off. So, do you think I am certifiably crazy to add to my menagerie? Never mind, don't answer that.

I knew it, I JUST KNEW IT!

Remember a couple of posts ago when I told you about S1 and his dalliance with the would-be slut? Well, we have some new developments that I KNEW would happen.

(No, she is not pregnant and no his maleness hasn't fallen off due to a form of crotch rot)

Remember I eluded to the fact that S1 doesn't do 'casual' well?? Yep, you guessed it...he has started to develop feelings for this chickypoo.

He had to head here, to hometown, yesterday for an eye exam ** and since dad and S3 took off for an away football game, it was just S1 and I here to eat and chat. He opens up when it is just the two of us. If dad is around or his brothers, it is all jokes, all the time. But, with me, he is himself because he can trust me (yeah, except that I tell the entire world here-nice mom!)

So, when he says the phrase "I need to ask you something", I know that it is going to be him asking my advice or opinion.

He then went on to ask me what I thought he should do about bootycallgirl. He said they are spending more and more time together, when they aren't in class they are together, and no, it's not always sex. He described her as a "female me" (meaning intellectual, politically aware, etc etc) . I asked if he was himself around her...actually sharing thoughts, not being a smartass, or argumentative -he often does this to create a debate-which he ultimately wins ;) He said yes. He is himself with her.

To me, that is HUGE. He is a kid that has a protective barrier around him most of the time, only letting his true self come through at home. Most people that meet him would think he is incredibly mature for his age (which he is), but they don't EVER see the side of him that will cry or show any emotion.

So, I asked where she stood on feelings, and he said he had not shared his feelings with her. She has told him that she really doesn't have a "reason" to break up with the older guy that she dates/sleeps with one day a week, when she goes to her hometown to work. To me, she is fishing for a "reason". I KNEW he wouldn't be able to keep it casual.

I asked him if he thought, if they dated, if she would screw around on him too. He said he didn't know. (At least he knows enough not to be deluded into thinking that she is not capable of doing so).

I was very blunt when I talked to him about the fact that if he is sleeping with her, and she is sleeping with the old guy, old guy is most likely screwing around on her too, so in essence, S1 is sleeping with A LOT of people. I directly warned him about herpeeez, wartz, HIVv, and just cooties in general. He assured me he was very well versed on cooties and never, ever, is without protection.

So, when he left late last night to go back to college town, he said he was going to talk to her and ask her if he was enough of a "reason" to let the old guy go.

To say I have mixed feelings is an understatement. My only requirement in life is that my sons are happy. When they pick a mate, I will welcome them with open arms. My boys aren't stupid and hopefully can see through any crap and make a good decision. Although, we all know that hormones can make you nuts and blur your vision.

As of this minute, it looks like I might, at some point, at least have to meet this girl. How in the hell am I going to look at her and not think she is a cooty carrying skanky ho? On the other hand, I am sure if my early 20's were held up for inspection, I might have not liked MYSELF, so I will reserve judgement until I can look her in the eye.

Updates will continue as the S1/skanky ho relationship develops :)

**He has horrid vision without his glasses. In fact his eyesight is one of my WORST PARENT IN THE WORLD moments. He was in second grade and a teacher suggested that he have a real eye exam, rather than the ones the schools provide, and off we went. (In my defense he was my first child and I didn't know as much as I do now). The eye doc determined that yes, S1 did need glasses. On the day of the fitting, he looked so cute and wasn't bothered at all by wearing the things. As we walked out of the office and he looked up the street...he stopped dead in is tracks. Up the street was our towns old movie theater. It showed hit movies in what is called 'second run', meaning they had been out and popular earlier and this theater snagged them the second time around. He looked at me and said "mom..The Lion Kin@ is at the theater" I said I knew, and told him to hurry up, we had to get somewhere. He then looked and me and said "but mom, I can SEE THE WORDS".

You could have dropped a piano on me right at that moment and I wouldn't have known. My child was telling me that for all of his 7 years, he couldn't see things beyond the two foot distance of his nose. He was reading and writing several years beyond his age, but couldn't see the chalkboard in his class.

The whole ride home, he was mesmerized by the sights. He told me, when he was older, that he had no idea that anyone could see that the leaves on the trees weren't just a mass of green color when driving by.. that you could actually see the shapes of the leaves.

I still have tremendous mommy guilt that I wasn't the one that saw his problem....but I thanked that teacher for changing his life.