Thursday, March 29, 2007


This amazes me: Couple Approach 80th Wedding Anniversary AP LUBEC, Maine (March 29) - Kathleen Tarbell "fell head over my stomach" for her husband Waldo when they met at a dance. They married in 1927, during Calvin Coolidge's presidency. This weekend, they'll celebrate their 80th anniversary. Waldo is 101 and Kathleen will turn 100 in June. The anniversary party will be Saturday afternoon at Oceanview Nursing Home, where the couple shares a large room. Maine's Office of Vital Records could not immediately determine if the Tarbells' marriage is the longest in the state. The 2007 Guinness Book of World Records lists a Rhode Island couple wed for 83 years as having the longest marriage among living people. Kathleen, a native of Pembroke, moved to Waldo's hometown of Meddybemps after they married. Two years later, they moved to Pembroke, where their two children, Helen Brown and Elliot Tarbell, were born. Waldo and Kathleen lived in their home in Pembroke until a few weeks ago. "I had to go to the hospital to have some X-rays taken. My back was killing me," Kathleen told the Bangor Daily News. After she was hospitalized, Waldo was moved to the nursing home and she later joined him. For 37 years, Waldo worked for Maine Central Railroad, at a starting wage of 37 cents an hour. After their children were raised, Kathleen worked for 32 years as a "herring choker and wrapper" at sardine factories. "Sometimes it'd be 10 o'clock at night before we'd get done. We'd go into work at eight in the morning. By the time we got home and got turned over in bed it was time to get up again," she recalled. Kathleen has been a Democrat her entire adult life. Waldo, originally a Republican , turned Democrat. "She converted me," he said. They remain up to speed on current events. Kathleen reads the newspaper every day, and she thinks the war in Iraq is "scandalous." "Somebody ought to take Bush and wring his neck, and I might be the one to do it," she said with a sparkle in her eye. I dont know her but I love her.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

I have a brother

I have a brother. I have never really blogged about him because we have a complicated relationship. He is 12 years older than I am and to be truthful we are complete opposites in every aspect of life. He has lived a high rollers life of Aspen in the winter, Vegas in the spring et cetera. The only problem is that he is NOT wealthy, he has just lived as though he were. Now he is sick and has nothing to fall back on. No money, no health insurance and not too many people that want to be around him for any length of time because he can be very obnoxious. It makes me very sad but on the other hand there are so many things that he did or didn’t do that caused him to be like this that it is hard to feel too much sympathy while at the same time, loving him because he is my brother. When our mom was dying he was trying to "score" with his soon to be second ex wife and they hopped a plane, headed to California…she had never been there…and I sat in shock watching our mom die while I was cradling my 6 week old baby that was finally born healthy after the pregnancy from hell. Oh, he DID call every day to ask how she was doing..the conversations went something like this: Him: How is she. Me: Awful. I can barely recognize her. The resident perforated her colon today doing a colonoscopy because they saw a "spot" of blood in her underwear. She has kidney failure, is headed for sepsis, is conscious on the vent and they had to do a fasciotomy in both lower legs so they wouldn’t explode. She is so sick that they may have to open her up to replace the graft they put in last year for her AAA that has become grossly infected because it is synthetic and antibiotics won't help. The ICU nurses are angels sent from heaven and have been doing their best to make her comfortable even confronting some of the docs that have written her off. Him: Okay. Well, let me know if there is anything I can do. Me: Yeah, whatever. Hope you are enjoying your trip. (You worthless motherfucker. I am here watching the woman that has supported you your entire worthless life both emotionally and financially. Don’t worry about stopping by, my C-section barely hurts anymore and son#1 is such a great toddler that he doesn’t even mind that he is spending his days in a hospital waiting room since they have building blocks. ) Okay.. I didn’t actually say that but I wanted to more than you can imagine). Him: Oh, good. I will check in with you tomorrow. Do you think she is really sick? Do you want me to come back east? Me: You do whatever you have to do to live with yourself. (I can’t believe you are even asking..she is our mother you asshole..where else should you be??!!..again thought but not said). At one time I wondered if I was being too hard on him. Maybe he didn’t handle stress well, and when I talked to several friends and Big D, they looked at me like I had lost my mind. None of them could comprehend how his head had gotten so far up his ass. They all knew my mom and what an amazing woman she was. I think before she died my mom summed up my brother in very few words…. "I am starting to see traits of his father in him" . For my mom that was a loaded statement and she was very sad when she said it. (For the record my father was also an asshole. He was a violent drunk and the smartest and bravest thing my mom did was divorce him in a time in history when divorce was not the norm…and she was catholic to boot.) Anyway, what started this whole post is that my brother is sick and has nobody. He has kids that have a very at-arms-length- relationship though they love him. Like I said, it is very complicated. He is too young for Medicare, has no insurance and tons of health problems (some of which can be attributed to smoking, drinking, and lifestyle) and not one doctor will touch him. He has been "dismissed" by more than one doctor…I can't blame them, I am sure they are afraid he will sue if he isn't "cured". He is always looking for a way to make a quick buck and it is obvious. He was in the hospital a couple of weeks ago for nothing life threatening but I had flashes of him going downhill at some point and wondering who would be there for him….even with our complicated history, I wouldn’t hesitate to be there for him, sit with him and be sure he wasn’t alone. Ironically one of his kids lives 15 minutes from him but can't seem to make the time to visit…hmmmm, like father like son??

Thursday, March 22, 2007


Okay gang~~Show me the love. I entered one of our kitties in a contest for lifetime TV...if you click this link and give me a 10 I am entered to win $1000.00 ~~ of course I would share :) Hey I gotta get the kid through college somehow.

Saturday, March 17, 2007

My week in review

This week has been a roller-coaster of emotions. On Monday I got a call from my doctor telling me that my second pap was abnormal like my previous one a few weeks ago. I immediately got sick to my stomach with thoughts of cervical cancer and dying before my kids were all grown and visions of the Big D (which is what I will now call my husband here-some days it is Big Dave, Big Don, Big Darren, Big Dreamy but quite often it is Big Dick so depending on my mood Big D always seems to fit) finally getting that trophy wife that I am sure he fantasizes about. So, now my next step is to find an OB/Gyn that is on my insurance and pray they know what the hell is going on and don’t pussy foot (no pun intended) around and either take all these old rotten parts out or find out exactly why things have gone abnormal in the past year. On Wednesday Big D left for a 4-5 day trip with a busload of drunks headed to a St. Patrick’s day parade 15 hours from here (he plays in a bagpipe band). Sometimes I go on these trips but with 3 kids here at home and nobody around to stay with them and the fact that it costs an ass load more money if I go too (his room is split between guys if they bunk together but if I go I draw the line at his band-mates snoring in the next bed). Obviously it costs a lot less to send only one of us and since I am not in a band, he is the obvious choice. Normally when these rare trips come up and I am not going I have planned weeks in advance to paint rooms, refinish furniture, et cetera but this time it is a good thing that I didn’t. I have barely had time to brush my teeth. I spent all day Friday with son #1 on a college visit. As I said in a previous post he was accepted 3 places. The school we visited on Friday is his first choice and by the time we were ready to leave he had pretty much committed to that school. Today in the mail he gets a letter from his second choice offering him a full ride to the tune of $40,000.000 a year. Shit. I don’t want this to be about money. His first pick has an outstanding architecture program with a Masters in 5 years with the last year spent in Florence Italy and a 90%, yes 90%, employment percentage within 3 months of graduation. Sounds pretty good to me and would obviously be a great fit for him….but the other school with 40 freakin thousand a year, that is really hard for a miserly bitch like me to sneeze at. So, the drama continues…at least till I see if his first choice may cough up some bucks..that would make it a lot easier to not feel ripped off. Also yesterday, son # 3 asked if he could have a party. I said no. He is only 12 but thinks he is about 17. We compromised and I told him he could have a "few" kids over. We finally agreed on 7 and amazingly it ended up being 3 boys (4 with him) and 4 girls. Honest to God, I have NEVER heard 8 kids make so much noise in my life! Thankfully it was only for 2 hours but by the end of that time I was ready to hang every one of them upside down and staple their toes to the wall. I have to say it was an equal opportunity noisy crowd, the girls were squealing and the boys were wrestling. I tried numerous tricks to get them all quieted down, games, movies, food, they only worked for about 45 seconds and they were back at it. But, the real kicker of the night is that son #3 had his FIRST KISS. One of the girls that came over was a little shy, very pretty, sweet girl and it turns out she and son have been crushing on each other for about 2 months. Well last night he laid a big lip lock on her and lived to tell about it. He was on cloud 9 and didn’t even complain when I told him that he had to clean up the mess when they all left. His feet were barely touching the ground. So my week has gone from fear of cancer, jealously of Big D having a grand time without me, seeing my 18 year old "baby" beaming walking around his probable home for the next 5 years to my youngest having his first kiss. If I were a drinking girl, this St. Patty’s day would be a real humdinger. Son #1 and son #2 are with their friends tonight and son #3 is at a sleep over. I should be enjoying the peace and quiet but here I sit feeling sorry for myself. Tonight I feel like I am just an extra appendage that doesn’t belong anywhere important. Here is to my one person pity party~cheers.

Sunday, March 11, 2007

not even a clever title

What a week. I have been very good about reading all my (too many;) blogs. I have not had time to post though. Lets see…since my last post husband is better but not back to normal..somehow this has become my fault. Don’t ask. Son #1 has pretty much decided on a college. He applied to 3, got into all and had to weigh all the options. One school is about $8,000 a year for tuition, another is around $9000 and the third is $39,000. I am trying not to push any of them but the $39,000 one almost made me choke on my tongue. Mind you this is BEFORE room and board and he is the first of 3 kids. We can either decide to blow the whole enchilada on one kid and tell the others-sorry outa luck, go into debt with a loan that you will be paying off till you have grandchildren, or we can hope that one of the other schools has the best program for what he wants to study. Fifteen years ago we invested in real estate and our plan was to sell our house when college time rolled around, buy a smaller place and get rid of expenses other than the basics. We have been living in a very large house in a beautiful neighborhood. Unfortunately in this price range homes are not selling so we are going to plan b. Oh, wait, we were young and stupid and didn’t have a plan b. I am typically a glass half full kinda girl and I also believe that all things work out the way they should. I learned a long time ago not to wonder when and why because things in my life have pretty much worked out the way they were meant to be, good or bad, there is usually a reason. Yesterday while at his last season basketball game son#3 got hurt and what was to be a quick afternoon of 2 basketball games ended up a very long day with a trip to the ER for an x-ray..thankfully nothing was broken but he is pretty sore today. THEN this morning, son #2 who also had a game yesterday, woke up telling me that his wrist really really hurt. I took a look and it doesn’t take a radiologist to see that his hand is sure sitting at a funny angle. Apparently the play that I missed (gabbing with another players mom) was when his fist went into the concrete wall. I have a feeling we may end up with another x-ray for our family this weekend…wonder if they give frequent flyer discounts. So to sum up the weekend, if any of you are radiologists that would like to buy a very large home, give me a heads up. Sorry for the boring post I feel drained and not the least bit clever this morning. I will take my happy pills and be back later~