Sunday, May 25, 2008


.....that I just pooped in the dining room. Maybe if I don't look directly at her she might not know. After all, it's not like it made the ENTIRE house stink or anything. Maybe she will take pity on me and remember that until a few weeks ago I was on my own and could poo where ever I wanted. It's a good thing I am so damn cute.
Along the same poo theme (my last post was about poo too, I promise I will get off that topic after this) for some reason the above pictured dog LOVES to rub his face in deer poo. I am constantly washing him when he comes in from his orgasmic rolls in deer dung. Any hints from any of you?? (The deer are here to stay since we basically built a house in their yard so shooing them away will be impossible, plus they are awesome to watch frolic in the yard).
Things have been hopping at chez nut home. I have dirty laundry piled to the door knob of the laundry room, three teenage boys sharing a bathroom that has become a hazmat zone for sure, and a husband that is making me even crazier than I was before and wondering why I put up with his shit. I have started to look forward to working at the docs office with 3 lines ringing off the hook, whiny male patients that can't seem to get over the fact that I have seen a penis before, said the word penis before and yes even touched one or two. It is very true that if men needed yearly paps, had to give birth etc, they would become extinct because they can't handle even the smallest procedures without thinking they are world winning martyrs. Even with all that going to work is a break from the constant onslaught of mess makers in my house.
Right now though I am fighting a battle with S2. He is 18, graduated this year and is off to college in August. He has decided that he wants a motorcycle. I have seen the remnants of bodies in the ER after car v. bike accidents and it is not pretty. Describing to him what brain matter looks like when it is bulging out of a young mans head has done nothing to sway him away from wanting one. (A bike, not a brain, he gave up long ago on wanting one of those:)
He keeps pulling the "I am 18 now and can buy one" and I counter with "yes but you still owe me $732 for gas, car repairs, loans etc". SO, I have decided that I won't even talk to him about a two wheeled vehicle until he pays me his outstanding debt. Since he is now unemployed (his boss went out of business) this may take awhile and by the time he has the money, it will be snowing again and the thought of a motorcycle won't be as appealing. At least that is my hope.
It is finally wonderfully sunny here today so I am off to plant some flowers that will make me happy. tata for now.

Thursday, May 08, 2008

Opinions welcome

Hi gang! Long time no type to. My life has been taken over by the rigors of trying to make enough money to fill up my friggin SUV with gasoline. What the hell is up with the price going up 50 cents OVER NIGHT! I would like to have a nice little chat (in a room with no witnesses) with a few oil execs and let them know what I am really feeling. I may be old but I bet I could still kick some ass. Speaking of work, I have a question to throw out there for you. What is proper poop etiquette in the workplace? Being self employed all these years I could walk 20 feet to the bathroom whenever I wanted to without offending anyone but the dogs. The other day I found that my morning cereal was also a laxative. There is one bathroom in the office and it is right next to the front desk area. Are you sensing where this is going? Help people! I have worked by myself for so many years that I can let pretty much everything fly, now I am entering an entirely new arena. This is a short post to just say hi and let you know that I am still alive. I have been reading your blogs and even commenting now and then but seriously work is kicking my butt around the block. It is not hard, and I even enjoy it, it just takes up a lot of my time when I really should be blogging. OHHH..and for those of you that have been reading for awhile, remember back in Jan/Feb I told you about ‘big medical office’ changing to the damn EMR……they still have NOT told me about it. I finally sent an e-mail to the office manager and asked her and being the complete flake that she is, she gave me a very vague answer, really not telling me anything. So, I am still in limbo and have no idea if they are switching in a week or a year. (It is definite they are switching and most likely it will be sooner rather than later, but hell, I can't get anyone to tell me—you would think I was asking for the ingredients for a nuclear missile). My mole inside the practice has told me she has been told that it will be in place by summer-uh…that’s only a few weeks away manager, wanna let me in on the secret?? I can't imagine not letting any of my employees know that they need to find an alternate source of income. I made it clear to the flaky manager that they accounted for my income, my JOB and that I would like to know some details. I even offered to help them make a smooth transition, offering to supply them with old archives etc that I have amassed over the years and made it clear that they would receive excellent service for as long as they need it (I was thinking maybe she didn't want to tell me thinking I would slack off or something-who knows!). So much for my short post....all I really needed to know is if it is ok to poop at work.