The phone rang about 90 minutes ago. It was S2 telling us that S1 was in a bad way.
He started drinking earlier tonight and has gotten so drunk they were afraid for his safety.
He was talking about wanting to die.
My heart is sick right now. I don't understand any of this. He is so smart, yet he refuses to believe that he has a problem. I am seeing now, that there is indeed a problem.
I know most young people, he is 21, that are in college have some sort of party time, but evidently this has been going on for a very long time. S1 is a master at hiding things, especially his feelings.
BigD hopped in the car and went to college town. He just called and S1 is ripping his father apart...."I never loved you" , "we have never been close" "just leave me alone". It breaks my heart. BigD may be strict, but he is very loving and all the boys should know that he loves them. He says it, he shows it, he means it.
So, here I sit at 2:30 in the morning wondering what do to next. I don't know how far this is going to go, if there needs to be some sort of an intervention to keep S1 from throwing his life away. We have no idea if alcoholism runs in his genes etc.
This is the third trip that BigD has had to make to college town in 3 years. It doesn't sound like alot, but there have been multiple times that I am sure we were not even aware of the gravity of the situation.
S1 has never had many friends. He doesn't think like his peers. He will sit and discuss/debate foreign policy, economic climates, political theory and on and on, but has a hard time relating to kids his own age. To him, they are all immature and don't have a focus. He had a long term girlfriend ( 2 1/2 years) that he split with 1 1/2 years ago and he hasn't had a serious relationship since. He says he isn't looking, yet when I talk to him, I can hear in his voice that each girl he dates, he is hoping settle down with. He likes consistency. Career wise, he tells me his wishes for the future and they mostly include some type of c0vert operations, C.IA, etc.
How do I make him realize that none of those dreams will come to fruition if he is throwing it all away now. He is brilliant, but not very smart.
I am sick with worry and I don't know what to do.