Friday, March 28, 2008

Cheap entertainment

Most of the time when I read someones blog, it rattles the recesses of my little mind and reminds me of some offbeat thing that has happened to me. While reading Dooce this morning (there is a link at the bottom...if you don't read her, you really should, she is hilarious) it reminded me of the time we almost took in a 30 pound wild raccoon. Yeah, I am surrounded by people that regularly encourage my eccentric love of all creatures with 4 feet (with some exceptions, like things with beadie eyes and hairless tails). The only sane one in the house is BigD and we rarely listen to anything he has to say. Anyway....several years ago our sweet old docile dog kept sniffing at the back door. We thought it was probably a skunk so we didn't open the door but I did turn on the back light and sitting on the deck railing was the biggest raccoon I had ever seen in my life. I don't know if I can even describe how he was sitting but he truly resembled a guy lounging in his fave barcolounger, sitting on his butt, leaning back on the side of the porch, back legs straight out, with a bird feeder between his front feet and his nose stuck in a hole that he had made. We all watched him for over an hour. He would look at us as if to say "don't even think about interrupting my meal" and go back to eating. The next day, I went out and filled the feeder again, and did this daily for 4 days. Every night he was our entertainment. Since the feeder was only about 3 feet from the window we had a great view and he had a great view of us. He would look at us but never budge from his spot. All he needed was a beer in one hand and he would have looked just like my stepfather. One night, he didn't come. By that time we had named him Big Mac (he looked like he had a daily mac habit) and we all were worried that this wild animal that we wanted to bring in and sleep on our bed, had been killed by another one of the multitude of creatures we have roaming our hood. A couple weeks later our sweet old dog was sniffing at the window in my office...hmmmm, since there is another feeder outside my window, I thought maybe BigMac was back so I opened the blinds and lo and behold there was BigMac and HIS babies....yes Mac was really a Mac-ette and she had brought her kids to meet the crazy lady that loves wild animals like they were domestic. They came back for a few nights then BigD started screaming at us about needing rabies shots in our stomachs and foaming at the mouth (us, not the raccoons) so I didn't put food out and she moved on, I am assuming with her brood in tow, and hasn't been back. This entire post was because of my flashback when I read Dooce today, so it is all her fault. (I also have another post brewing in my head about butt juice but I will save that for another day.)


Anonymous said...

Your raccoon story reminds me of when my oldest daughter was in high school. One day she came home with the front spoiler on her car crunched. She said she hit a big raccoon. Her father said a raccoon couldn't have done that. She swore that it had. A few days later was driving younger child to school and saw a large dead raccoon on side of road. Asked oldest daughter where she hit raccoon.. yep same place. And yes, that monster sized critter did that damage!
..And about raccoons stealing bird food.. had that problem too. Darn things would cost a fortune to feed!!
Oh,,about Canada... I think for my son and his friends,(I'm ashamed to say) it was all about getting in to strip clubs!

Rob, Tina and the boys said...

That's awesome. Although, you almost ended up oweing me for a new computer screen, as I nearly spit out my coffee laughing. :)