Friday, December 08, 2006

Notice to infertiles

Before I start work in the morning I try to catch up on the 17 (yeah, I know, I spend waaaaay too much time online) blogs that I began reading several months ago. I noticed that 9 of them are now expecting, some with twins. Two more are pending with + home tests, one has avoided a scary cancer scare that while it ripped away her chance of pregnancy, may have saved her life. Now I don't want to brag but isn't it a tad suspicious that since I started reading these blogs (some of whom have been on the horrid infertility treadmill for quite some time) that these ladies are now expecting. I would like to think that I am directly responsible somehow...and none of them even had to rub my belly or anything. We were infertile for 8 years. IT WAS FOREVER. Each time I read one of your stories I am transported back to that time in my life where my only thought was becoming a mom...I feel your pain when you experience a miscarriage, having been there 4 times myself. The emotions are raw and nearly impossible to repress.For me, each positive pregnancy test was a baby--no matter how long the pregnancy lasted, it was our baby and I couldn't succeed in giving it life. I felt like a failure--surely I had done something "wrong". This is an open note to all of you still struggling~~there are so many decisions to make~try to step back from the situation and see it with fresh eyes~if you don't have a support system with your family (they rarely really understand the depth of your pain, while they do sympathize-unless they have been through it, they don't really get it), find someone who has been in your shoes and talk,talk, talk. It really does help. I wish blogging had been around when I was struggling. I would be happy to talk/email to any of you that need to vent or have questions about adoptions and scary pregnancies. I am truly excited for the 9 of you that are queasy :)


One Mother's Journey said...

I have 83 blogs that I routinely read... 83. What does that say about me? lol Don't answer.

Glad someone is out there pregnant.

Even though I didn't end up with another baby I actually credit blogging for saving me. Had I not been so engrossed in the inner working of my non-functioning girlie bits, I wouldn't have known just how broken they were. Scary thought.

You can take credit for some of the new babies but I still think that my dropping out of the running helped a lot on their way as well. That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

Anonymous said...

I have 71 feeds on my bloglines account. So really, 17 hardly seems bad at all!

I hope you are the good luck charm we all need.

OHN said...

Wow you two really made me feel alot less guilty. In fact, I think I have been officially challenged to come up to your level. Off I go.... :)

DD said...

135 here.

BuoYA! (Bloglines saves my ass)

Do you think rubbing your belly would help? I'll take anything I can get.