Tuesday, November 21, 2006

World's worst parent award

I was reading Smarshy's blog and it reminded me of the time that I most felt like the worst parent in the world. Son #1 was in second grade and his teacher asked if he had ever worn glasses. He had not and had passed the little exam they give at school every year so I never thought to go to a real eye doctor for an exam. He was reading and writing by age 4 so nothing seemed amiss. Here is where the worlds worst mother comes in.....I took him to a doc in town here and she said he did in fact need glasses. The day we picked them up, he put them on, we walked outside and he stopped dead in his tracks. He looked at me and said, "look Mom $%&(+# is at the theater", naming the name of the movie on the marquee. The theater was the next block up and this was the first time he had ever been able to see that distance. I stood there feeling like I had robbed this poor child of vision for the first 7 years of his life. On the drive home, he was staring at the trees. He never knew that you could see individual leaves on trees when you weren't standing right in front of them. I still feel bad about it. None of the signs were there. He was excelling in school, reading, writing and never even knew that he couldn't see, until he got his glasses and realized what things really looked like. I don't know if I will ever forget that day and I am sure he wouldn't remember it even if I reminded him. Parental guilt-like a kick in the gut.


Beagle said...

Don't beat yourself up . . . the seeing the leaves now part is more important than the missed stuff part.

I had a similar experience as a kid (I was 12) and you know, I still look at blades of grass and leaves with amazement . . . I probably would have never noticed them if I had not missed them first, so maybe that is the "gift" here.

KeDaCoMo said...

I agree. it is hard to see these things. Kids don't tell you things. My son when he was 5 broke his foot and we didn't even notice that he was not walking on it correctly until 2 days later. talk about worst parent award. We felt bad but fortunately they were able to fix his foot.

also, I got my glasses when I was ten, 20 years ago. And I remember the excitement of knowing that the lights in the distance were really not like fluff balls but actual light. I think he will remember the gift of sight, but will never ever put blame on you for the time he did not see well.

Nickie said...

man, that's rough. My little guy was dx with severe constipation earlier this year. So bad that he literally couldn't move anything out. It's taken months of laxative therapy to get his body back to normal. I felt pretty badly that I hadn't realized it had gotten so bad. He'd always had a tendency to get backed up, but this was pretty bad. Even the pedi commented that this was one of the worst she'd seen in months. (bad mommy!)