Friday, November 10, 2006

18 years ago today

I don't know if anyone even reads this blog but just in case, I wanted to share the letter that I wrote this morning to our birthday boy. There are so many people struggling with infertility as we did and maybe this will show them a different way to make a family. I am feeling a little emotional today. I do on each birthday. I not only celebrate his day but I also think about his birth mom. I know she is thinking about him too. By my calculations she would be about 34-35 or so and most likely has a husband and children. I have very mixed feelings....I would love to meet her to thank her for her very unselfish act, but I also would be afraid--afraid that they may connect on a level that I won't understand. Dear **** Eighteen years ago today a wonderful baby was born. We had no idea at the time that we were going to be blessed with him as our son. From the moment you were placed in my arms, I completely adored you and knew you would be special. Not just in the normal "every baby is special" way. There was something in your eyes that day that gave me such peace and hope for the future. Each day you progressed you proved me right over and over. There was never a baby that was more loved than you. First by two very loving young people that wanted you to have every possibility in life to thrive, then by Dad and I who promised to fulfill that hope. You have become a wonderful young man. My wish for you is to have the amazing life you so deserve~ happiness, love, contentment and confidence. If you have those, everything else falls into place. Because of who you are, your life will be full of endless possibilities. Don’t ever be afraid to follow your heart. I know you like to keep your heart hidden at times, but those same eyes I saw as an infant are still showing the spirit that you can't hide from me. I love you more than you can understand at this point in your life. If you have a son one day, only then you may understand how much you mean to me. I love you and am so very proud of the man you have become.


SmarshyBoy said...

Such a very nice letter, thanks for sharing it. It reminds me alot of how I feel about my daughter. I totally agree with what you say, it is impossible to understand the true meaning of love until you have a child. Your son is very lucky.

OHN said...

Thanks Smarsh-actually when we gave him his present (we made his car payment this month:) I also handed him the letter and told him to read it later(his brother had friends over), he not only read it right then but he read it OUT LOUD. My husband and I stood there stunned...he is normally a very shy kid that doesn't show outward affection in front of "outsiders" but be read it with pride--will wonders ever cease?!

steph said...

That is so freakin cool. I think it is a wonderful idea to write your children letters.
One year, I had a girl weekend and wrote each of my friends a letter about what I love and admire about them. We don't often say it enough, or find it hard to express verbally, but I think it is important for people to know how, well, important they are!

And many times the response is it's own reward, even when you're not expecting one.
Happy Birthday to him, and in a sense, you!

The Independent Urologist said...

Diddo what SmarshyBoy said.

lola said...

I am crying over here after reading that.

What a wonderful letter. How lucky your son is to have such amazing parents.

Beagle said...

I'm teary reading this.

We are just starting down the domestic road and I've been watching Barely Sane's story with white knuckle worry and lots of hope.

I saw your comment and came to visit your blog for another adoption story.

You guys sound like an amazing family all around!