Thursday, March 24, 2011

Have you ever

put something in the fridge, something that you ate 1/2 of for dinner the night before, only to get your mouth all prepared for it's greasy goodness for breakfast, and find that some inconsiderate SOB ate it? WHILE YOU WERE SLEEPING.

I had it wrapped up, stuck up on the top shelf, and BigD knew it was mine. S3 and I had to make a run to a neighboring town last night and they happen to have a Fi.ve Guys burger place (soooo good and soooo bad for you). Since we don't make this trip often, when we do, we stop and pick up the burgers. I CALLED BigD to see if he wanted one. Nope. Not hungry. That is, until I fell asleep and he snuck his sorry ass down to the kitchen and ate my dinner/breakfast.

Ordinarily anything in the fridge is fair game, but, the fridge at this moment is full of food, (Italian meatloaf, various veggies, au gratin potatoes, various fruits, roasted chicken, ham etc) yet he chose MY 1/2 burger to satisfy his nocturnal munchies. If you are wondering why I only ate 1/2, it's because they are big. Really big. While I could have eaten the whole thing, and even licked the wrapping, I don't want to gain back the tonnage that I have lost.

I called BigD at work and asked him if he was guilty. He said "yeah, I was hungry", then had the nerve to say "remember that leftover donut from a couple of weeks ago, I wanted that and when I went to eat it, it was gone" OHHHH, I get it. One donut from a box of 12 (of which he had already eaten a few) that was put on the counter for anyone to enjoy is exactly the same as eating someones dinner.

OH, and just last week he was telling me how he really wanted to lose weight. He needs to. He is walking heart attack waiting to happen. (don't judge me for having any treats in the house, if I don't, he pouts and whines and gets actually pissed--no, he isn't 12, but at times his age is questionable). Remember, I am NOT his mother. I love sweets. I would probably have convulsions if I didn't have them...often. BUT, I don't eat all of them at once and I buy the least fattening treats I can----with the exception of Fat Tue.sday. Baby, that day, I will eat all the custard filled, chocolate iced poonchkies I can find.

So, I had to settle for a breakfast that was nowhere near as delightful as my grilled onion and mayo cheeseburger would have been. Remember, he said he didn't want a burger. I thought mine was safe. Now I know better. It's war.

8 comments:

preppyplayer said...

Story of my life sister!
When the boys were in highschool and in their growth spurts, I was constantly hiding food. I would make a huge meatloaf thinking the leftovers would be perfect for lunch the next day... and they would come home from a night on the town and eat it ALL as a snack!
I couldnt figure out how to hide a meatloaf!

The Hopkins Happenings said...

What irks me is when I see a box of something so I don't buy more when I'm at the grocery store, only to find out later that the box is empty. HOW HARD IS IT TO PUT THE BOX IN THE TRASH?! Apparently it's pretty difficult.

awomanmyage said...

He needs to pay! BIG TIME! This is sin that would cost my dear hubby serious dough. Oh, yeah, baby, I take good old, multi-coloured Canadian cash.

edenland said...

Oh MATE. I am so, so sorry for your loss. I fell in love with your Fi.ve Guys last year in NY, so I understand the pain and shock of what you must be going through right now.

Next time, wrap it up and hide it behind some lettuce and vegetables. THEY NEVER LOOK THERE.

Sincerely,
Fellow Vagina Overlord

XOXOX

Sarah@afterhood said...

Amazing how they can distinguish between the empty milk carton(that they put pack on the shelf) and the left over lasagna you tucked away at the back of the cheese drawer, or the package of 'guest' cookies. My Husband can't find his car keys or phone ('Honey, where is my...') but he can find the treats.
With three grown children, our pantry is often pretty bare of snack foods. When the 'kids' arrive home, I go shopping, and My Husband will sing out "Thank goodness, we have REAL food in the house!"

Ronda said...

This is too funny!! Just the fact that you ASKED if he wanted anything, and he said no, is maddening! I go through this all the time. It's sad when you have to start hiding food from your family. But you asked, and it was Yours! Start hiding your goodies in a dog-food can in the frig!
XO

dana said...

Right now I have two very cold pieces of pizza hiding behind the bowl of homemade chili...hmmmm...I might be changing my mind...

Nicole said...

I started hiding things from the husband and kids. if it is something I really want, I put it in the back of the fridge or in the produce drawer. lol I learned that from childhood and a greedy brother.