Tuesday, February 27, 2007

marriage vows

Marriage vows. How seriously should they be taken? For the most part I agree with them though I didn’t agree to obey hubby. I rarely obey anyone. I am very easy going till someone gives me a direct order, especially given with a shitty tone, then I rebel. I do agree with the forsaking all others part..no sense in spreading icky diseases except back and forth between the two of you. The one part that I find I am having trouble with is the in sickness and in health part. Now mind you, I have willingly and with much love nursed hubby through a nearly fatal MRSA infection after a "routine" arthroscopy at our local hospital. This is a very long story that I will post at another time…this MRSA is a scary thing. Anyway, I digress. You see hubby is home with what seems like a pretty crappy case of bronchitis, lots of mucus and wheezing going on here these days. I have been a dutiful wife, bringing cheer and the occasional chicken soup to his bedside, rarely letting him see me recoil when he spews disgusting fungi every time he coughs. My problem?…I draw the line when he is sleeping on MY PILLOW! He sees nothing wrong with using mine if it can make him more comfortable. Mind you this is a man that has 4, yes 4, pillows. I have 1. When I went to bed last night my soft feather pillow that allows me to sleep peacefully was under his snot ridden head. Thankfully he had to get up to go to the bathroom and I scooped up my pillow, went to the closet and put 2 new pillow cases on it, after removing the one that was his viral catch basin. I then went to bed half pissed because I wondered if the germs had worked their way into the interior feathers and I was going to get sick even with new pillow cases. This morning when I got up I performed a very sneaky maneuver. As I arose slowly, I "accidentally" dropped my pillow off my side of the bed (the floor HAS to be cleaner than hubby at this point). I think he is probably sick enough that he won’t go looking for my pillow but just in case, I am headed to Bed Bath and Beyond this morning to buy myself a new pillow and some sort of pillowcase that he would hate to have under his snotty head. Mind you I am not a Howie Mandel type of germiphobe but in my opinion under no circumstances should a person ever use another persons pillow, toothbrush, underwear, and I will even go as far as not sharing eating utensils or double dipping a half chewed chip or carrot back into a community dip bowl~~it is just gross. My kids share my feelings, (momma has taught them well) and will verbally chastise anyone they see committing any of the germ sins.

Friday, February 23, 2007

The rambling queen

I like to believe that I am fairly intelligent. Blogger makes me feel stupid. I finally switched to "new" blogger because I couldn't leave witty, intelligent, thought provoking and eloquent responses on some blogs and I know these folks are wondering where I went. I am almost certain that they can't begin their days without my wisdom. SO, for those folks I have switched and I pray that this enables me to impart my vast years of knowledge in response to their blogs. It is snowing again. I really need a vacation. Hubby is being an ass. Sons are whiny and believe the world revolves around them. My bills are higher than my income. Son #2 got his first ticket and has to go to court (I hope it costs him a bunch to teach the little shit that YES, RULES DO APPLY TO HIM TOO, and I am not paying one single dime). The puppy is chewing everything in site, including some receipts I need for our taxes. Britney is a train wreck and her loser husband is looking like the better parent. scary. I need to clean my office. I can't remember the last time I saw a grown-up movie at a theater so the Oscar's mean nothing to me. Denny came back on Grey's last night-he is very very hot. The above paragraph proves either I need a vacation or medication..not sure which...or maybe both :)

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Will power

Will power This is something that I used to have. Somewhere along the way it was either stolen or misplaced because I don’t have it any more. I have a personal goal to lose a bunch of weight before this summer since I am going to be forced to wear a bathing suit on a vacation that I desperately need. Tonight when I picked up son #3 from his basketball practice he happened to mention that he was a little bit STARVING TO DEATH. Even though I was pretty sure he was exaggerating slightly he was relentless and we ended up swinging through the golden arches. I personally haven't eaten any fast food in months and didn’t plan on having any this time either. When we pulled up to the sign the little man inside asked what I wanted…I was immediately spellbound by his slightly graveled tone and his rippling Ab’s—oh wait, that part was in my head. Anyway, I thought that since they have all these things for only a buck and I had 8 to spare I would get some things off the dollar menu to bring home for the other bottomless pit children for their midnight snack (the one before their 2 am snack). As we were pulling away with a bag of relatively warm double cheeseburgers I nonchalantly stuck my hand in the bag and managed to unwrap and devour a double cheeseburger without even removing my other hand from the wheel. As that first squirt of salty greasy meat slithered across my tongue and down my throat I was torn by orgasmic proportions of happiness and nauseating disgust for my lack of will power. If I didn’t hate puking, I would consider bulimia (no offense or disrespect to any of you skinny bitches that do this on a regular basis, I just hate puking). So, tomorrow I will have to somehow forgive myself and maybe pray that it will be sweatshirt weather in July in Florida.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

out my window

This is happening out my window today. We have actually had about 6-8 more inches since I took these pix earlier this morning. Needless to say, the kids are home again. If they get another snow day tomorrow they will be off for the next 5 since they already have off Fri and Mon. Obviously it was fun at first but now I am losing my mind, or what is left of it. Son#2 thinks--yippee..no school, I am going to take mom's car and drive all over northeast Ohio doing donuts in parking lots..it aint happenin kid. So, because of his obnoxious mouth, annoying attitude and relentless whining that the world belongs to him, I grounded him....take that you little shit. The only problem with that is that having him out of the house for the day would be A WHOLE LOT more fun for me that seeing him sulk around every corner. It is days like this that I have to remember my infertile years and how I would cry every time I saw a baby. I should have been picturing them as teenagers.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

One Mother busted

I just found out that one of my favorite blogs has had to shut down because the blogger was busted by one of her kids. Damn kids, they ruin everything. I only hope that this blogger knows she still has many of us out here that can relate to her horrible past year and will still be wondering how she is doing. My kids don't know I blog...they know I read them but not that I have one. I am not sure how they would react...actually they would probably not care too much and if anything, would call me dumb or stupid and would NEVER understand why I need to vent here. They just aren't that deep. Remember these are guys that have no clue why women love flowers, cry at love stories, keep drawings from when the kids were in kindergarten or anything remotely sentimental. I am doing my damned best to raise these males with some sort of sensitivity but it is much like a salmon swimming up stream..by the time I get there I will die.

Sunday, February 04, 2007

random thoughts

For those of you that are wondering...Harley is doing great. I am soooo glad that I followed my gut and got another pup. He isn't replacing Tucker but he is becoming a new member of the family in his own way. Here are a couple photos to show you how we treat animals that become family members..yeah, we are a bit over the top. The pillow is son #2.

Our phone rang a bit ago and it was our school systems computer generated calling system to let us know that the kids don't have school tomorrow...it is too damn cold! I honestly do get it...the kids that have to walk etc but I don't ever remember having school closed for much of anything when I was a kid. Yeah, I know " I used to walk 150 miles barefoot across jagged glass in my day"...no gramps it wasnt quite that bad but I lived in an area of the country that we had snow from halloween till Easter and not much stopped us from getting where we needed to go. Right now I think it will be fun having the boys home tomorrow...ask me again about 10 am when they are really annoying me. As I sit here in the blissful peace and quiet of my office there is a group of males of various ages sitting in my family room watching the game. As I have established in previous posts, I don't care much for football so I encouraged husband to invite his best buddy over with his kid that is friends with son #3. I cooked alot of artery clogging food then retreated to the warmth and comfort of my office and back to back episodes of Monk. For some reason, I totally get that guy.

Actually I have no business sitting here blogging (and I just added another 3 blogs to my list of ones I will keep reading~~I would show you my blog roll, but I can't figure out how to do that). I have about 3 hours of actual work to do that needs to be done by 7 am....just can't seem to get interested right now. I think I will wander upstairs, crank up the electric blanket and call it a night. The work will still be there when I get up and what would take me 3 hours tonight will only take me about an hour when I am actually functioning in the morning :)

nitey nite.