ME? You want to know about ME?

I don't usually do memes but my buddy Deathstar ( http://awomanmyage.wordpress.com/) sent out a challenge and I don't back down from a good challenge. Plus, I am trying to avoid some boring projects.

ABC meme

A. Age: 53 (not sure when I sailed past 32)

B. Bed size: King. I need my space.

C. Chore you dislike: Windows. Even with that windex crap you rig to a hose my windows looks bad. I have 39 windows (plus ones that never get cleaned because they are not reachable) so it is a huge pain in my ass to do windows.

D. Dogs: Two. I have had solos all my life, but once I got a second, I vowed to have two at all times for the rest of my life. Would you want to be the only human in a house of dogs????

E. Essential start to your day: Cold L.ipton green tea, or white raspberry tea. I had a peach S.napple addition that I had to break. Even now when I cruise down the tea aisle in the store I have to tell myself to keep walking past the beloved S. Oh, and I hate coffee. All kinds. (except for the caramel frappé at McD's...but that kills my guts)

F. Favorite color: If its clothes, probably blue, though I don't have any. I wear a lot of black, though don't particularly like it.

G. Gold or silver: I wear both. At the same time. So there fashionistas who say it is a faux pas.

H. Height: I use to be 5'6", now am creeping down to 5'5". Before I die, I suspect I will be 2'4"

I. Instruments you play(ed): Piano lessons x 1 year, organ lessons x 1 year (yeah, still hate my mother for that one..she may as well have tattooed dork on my forehead)

J. Job title: Job seeker.

K. Kids: Yes. Three. That I always wanted and never thought I would have.

L. Live: Midwest, where it is cold more often than not. I crave beaches. The only thing keeping me here is kids. I need to convince them that island living is the way to go.

M. Mom’s name: Can't say. Too unusual and googleable.

N. Nicknames: Punky, Pookie, and sometimes punkypoo.

O. Overnight hospital stays: I don't remember them all, but they all had to do with either trying to get pregnant, trying to stay pregnant or delivering the results of the prior two.

P. Pet peeves: Stupidity. There is no reason, for anyone, to ever be stupid. Also, people that don't wash their hands. Howie Mandel is my hero.

Q. Quote from a movie: "Are you a good witch, or a bad witch"

R. Righty or lefty: Righty. I only have a left hand to balance my body. Other than that, it is useless.

S. Siblings: One. Oy-vey.

T. Time you wake up: 5:50 am during the week. 7:00 am on weekends. Yes, to me that IS sleeping in.

U. Underwear: If I have to leave the house...you know, for that accident my mom always warned me about.

V. Vegetables you don’t like: cruciferous

W.What makes you run late: WAITING FOR OTHER PEOPLE. I am always on-time or early.

X. X-rays you’ve had: Pick a body part. They have all been irradiated.

Y. Yummy food you make: I'm a baker. Love to bake. I make up massive batches of cookie dough, make little balls and freeze them so I can make cookies whenever I want without making a mess. (You're welcome, it IS a great idea.)

Z. Zoo animal favorites: Monkeys. I want to sneak in at night and set them all free. I think they are more intelligent than many people I know.

So, there you go.

Newly marrieds??

You might want to click away. I certainly wouldn't want to be the one to rip that bloom off your rose and tell you that someday, you will realize that your now perfect husband, really never was perfect, and truly does not fart rainbows and unicorns.

I found myself having to take S3 to school this morning (car issues--don't get me started on that) and for most of the ride I was explaining to him (okay, so it was more of a rant) that before he gets married he should go buy and do everything he thinks he will ever want to buy and do..because once he is married you have another person in your life that thinks they are allowed to have an opinion.

As you know over a year ago we started our kitchen re-do. I found the perfect granite in 15 minutes at the granite place. It took BigD over a month to decide that he picked it out and it was perfect. Next came the sink. Then lord-help-me the light fixtures. I found all of them and it took him weeks to decide they were perfect.

When I see something I like, I know it. I don't need to think about it twice. If I do, then it is obvious to me that I must not like it enough.

Which leads me to the kitchen table. Right now, we have our dining room table in the kitchen, and subsequently have an empty dining room. We only use the dining room when we are forced to host holiday feasts, other than that we are kitchen people.

BigD hates our dining room set. It was my grandmothers...and before you can say ewwwww, it must be dated, and old and ugly...it isn't. It is old, but it is hand-carved oak and gorgeous. It is a small set, because people used to be smaller, ya know? So it fits in our kitchen but BigD hates it. Fine, lets get a new kitchen set. Simple huh?

Shit.

I have been looking for months. I keep emailing possible sets to myself and showing them to him. He doesn't like any. He wants metal. Yes, I said metal. We have a tusc.an kitchen, cracked walls, exposed brick, dark granite, dark brownish cast iron sink, cherry cabinets, new black/bronze hardware, black fridge, and yes, the light fixtures are a dark antique bronze (think powdercoat) with warm fluted inverted globes.Trust me, a metal table would not fit the vibe of the kitchen at all. I haven't seen any that aren't too small, or that don't have a glass top. If you knew my crowd, you would know that it would be easier to keep an elephant pen at the zoo cleaner than a glass top table in our kitchen.

Also, I want something that we can put a leaf in when all the boys and their girlfriends/spouses/et. al arrive for a meal. All the sets I see with metal are 4 chairs. So if you do the math, me, BigD and three sons, (not including their upcoming families), someone needs to sit on the floor. (I vote BigD). I found a very pretty set that was a combination of black and cherry (hmmmm, sounds like it would really look great in a kitchen with cherry cabinets and black hardware) and he said "that's not what I had in mind".

I am just so sick of all the crap. He made the statement last year that I had no opinion on the types of plantings he wants to do outside....that's HIS area. Well, fuck you very much.

Before you tell me to just go ahead and get what I want because the kitchen is MY area...note that he still is angry about something that happened (minor) 25 years ago and every chance he gets he brings it up. I am married to a child.

So, I decided this morning I am done. I won't look any more and next year I will be writing a post about BigD finding this lovely cherry and black set that would be perfect. Except by then, they won't be available.

I still swear, being a lesbian is the way to go.....if I didn't have to have sex with women.